Tuesday, 26 July 2011

Japanese Inventions

Japan is one of the most technologically advanced countries in the world. In fact, it probably has more famous automotive and electronic companies than any other country (including the USA).* Today, I will look at some Japanese technological achievements that have not caught on out side of Japan. Most people think Japan is awash with bizarre inventions but that is not really true. One of the best Japanese inventions I have seen is actually a modification to the toilet, but before I deal with that, I will introduce you to a few bizarre inventions just to keep the myth alive!

First, the “Eco-Otome Toilet Sound Blocker.” When you are in a cubicle of a public toilet and do not wish the person next door to hear the sound of you excreting (if there is any sound at all!), you press the button on the “Eco-Otome Toilet Sound Blocker” and are treated to the sound of a toilet flushing for 25 seconds at sufficient volume to mask any undesirable sounds that may be produced by you. This could also come in useful if you are vomiting in the toilet. The device is small and attaches to your key ring. It’s an interesting invention but I don’t know anyone who owns one.

Second, the “boyfriend arm pillow” and its male equivalent, the “lap pillow.” I think the below photos are self-explanatory. There must be many lonely girls and dirty men in Japan! 
 


Third, the “baby mop.” Once again, the below photo is self-explanatory. It’s not child exploitation because it’s cute, right?!
 

Still, the best Japanese invention that I have seen, and one which is very common, is the cistern/basin (please see the below photo). As you know, the water we flush down the toilet is precisely the same water that comes out of our bathroom tap. Every toilet flush uses (or wastes) several liters of water. The cistern/basin minimizes this wastage by piping the water, which refills the cistern after each flush, through a tap into a basin on the top of the cistern. After flushing the toilet, you wash your hands in the stream of water that automatically flows from the tap into the basin. The water from the basin then drains into the cistern so it can be used for the next flush. Ingenious! The cistern/basin (1) saves water, (2) improves hygiene by removing the need to touch tap handles in order to turn the tap on and off and (3) saves space by removing the need for a separate basin. These should be everywhere!



Thank you for reading and take care.

Our Man in Japan.

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* Here is a list of famous Japanese companies I could think of off-hand. As you can see, there’s a lot.

Automotive: Honda, Yamaha, Kawasaki, Suzuki, Mazda, Toyota, Daihatsu, Subaru, Mitsubishi, Isuzu, Nissan and Bridgestone.

Electronic: Sony, Sanyo, Panasonic, JVC, Casio, Kenwood, Daikin, Pioneer, Ricoh, Seiko, NEC, Toshiba, Fuji Xerox, Hitachi, Akai, Nintendo, Sega, Korg and Kawai.

Photographic: Canon, Nikon and Minolta

Friday, 15 July 2011

Your Life as a Statistic

***WARNING! This post contains cynicism and irreverent humour. If that sort of thing offends you, I suggest you do not read any further. If you do read on, please note that this is all said in jest!***

I have now been in Japan for a few months and am growing quite accustomed to being here. The other day I wondered what life holds for me back in Australia. Since I wasn't blessed with the powers of prophecy, I decided to consult the website of the Australian Bureau of Statistics to get some idea of what awaits the average Australian like myself. So here it is: your life as a statistic!

Now if you're living in Australia, I’m guessing you were born there since 73.4% of Australians were. If you were born overseas, you are probably a Pom, in which case, please be assured we have heard all jokes about Australians and convicts already!

You grew up with 0.9 of a sibling. Along with 74.3% of your school chums you finished high school but like 77% of people you didn't get a bachelor's degree. Who wants a higher education debt any way?

You decide to work in the private sector since you thought that would be more lucrative than being a public servant. Alas, you end up earning $65,535.60 per year while the bloke next door, who works full time in the public service, pulls $74,521.20. You ask yourself why he earns more than you despite the fact he works less hours, bears no business risk and continuously claims he is being under-paid.

At the age of 31.5, it dawns on you that your salary alone is insufficient to service a mortgage, so you decide to get married. Your wife is 29.3 years old because the 18 to 25-year-old spouses in the mail-order catalogue were beyond your budget.

At age 33 you realise you will need someone to look after you in your old age (or at least visit you once a year at the old folks home), so you have your first child. This proves to be a great mistake. The horrendous costs of providing the essentials of life (e.g. food, shelter, iPhone, PlayStation, bail payments, etc.) makes your already parlous financial situation even more difficult. To make matters worse, contraception fails a few years later and you are burdened with another 0.9 of a child. You curse the fact you never got a vasectomy.

After 12.3 years of marriage, you awake one morning to find that your wife has run off with a sailor. You're not surprised given that 41.2% of marriages end in divorce. Besides, the “love and honour” warranty you were given by the mail-order company was only valid for the first 90 days.

Years pass. The labours of being a single-parent slowly take their toll. You become overweight like 61.4% of Australians and depressed like 20%. You turn to drinking to cure your blues consuming 2.6 drinks per day (which is almost as many as your 15-year-old son consumes … on a school night).

You remark to yourself that this is truly a dog's life then later learn that the average Australian dog has $2,395 per year spent on it. When was the last time anyone spent $2,395 on you?

After 73.9 years, you succumb to an ischaemic heart attack. In your final moments, your life flashes before your eyes, and you realise that your existence was, in every sense, truly average.

Thank you for reading and take care.

Our Man in Japan.